This Can't Be Happening

I keep saying to myself, this isn’t happening, this isn’t real. It feels like parts of my brain randomly shut off, my thought process just isn’t capable of processing today events.

5 hours ago my mom told me she has cancer, I just dnn’t beilieve it. I can’t get my head to process this. I go from laughing, crying then numb. I’m 46 now an as silly as it sounds, I have never in my life had the thought that my mom wouldn’t answer when I called, or listen to me when I talk about all my stupid little problems.

Until today there was no world that my mother wasn’t in, now some how I have to be strong and support here knowing that there is a very real chance that she won’t be for much longer.

How do I deal with this, how goes anyone, how do people move wiht life after something like this.

This isn’t really, this isn’t happening…